“Mummy, Mummy”. The heartrending cries came from the lounge. Tina almost dropped the bowl of porridge she was making.
Dread settling into a heavy lead ball in the pit of her stomach she rushed into the lounge fearing what she might find. David, her little boy was standing still, knuckling his eyes and tears pouring down his soft baby cheeks. In the split second that she allowed herself to think, Tina established that she could see no sign of blood or visible injury. Gathering the small body into her arms she tried to comfort him.

“There there sweetheart, whatever is wrong?”

She could feel his shoulders heave as he tried to blurt out the cause of his tears but all he could do was point and sob. Following the direction of his tear-stained gaze, Tina sighted on the budgie cage. Last night when they had gone to bed, Joey had been chirping and merrily pecking at his millet but today it was obvious he would do it no more. The budgie’s tiny body lay on the bottom of the cage, little legs like dead twigs, an apt description as Joey was obviously very dead. Tina hugged David tighter.

“Oh darling I am sorry, poor Joey must have been sick during the night. Mummy will cover him up and after breakfast, we will go to the park and bury him”. David brightened visibly.

“Can I take my seaside bucket and spade to help dig the hole? Can we have lots of flowers and a big black car like the ones you said take dead people to their last homes” scarcely taking a breath, David excitedly asked, “Can we say a prayer like we did when Daddy got killed and you couldn’t stop crying?”

Carefully, Tina took a cloth out of the drawer and hung it over the cage to cover the sad little body. “Come on tiger, eat up all your breakfast then afterwards we will look for a box to put Joey in”. This seemed to please David and tears forgotten, he headed for the kitchen. Following him, Tina glanced at the photo on the television. A smiling man in army uniform gazed out of the frame his face the image of the little boy in the kitchen.

“ It’s no good looking all handsome and smiling that smile at me, where are you when I need you?”, thought Tina not for the first time. Life had adjusted to a sort of pattern since Peter’s death two years ago but it was a very lonely life. David was wonderful company but he was growing up very quickly and soon she would be spending more and more time alone - not a very pleasant prospect. Shaking off her morbid thoughts, she joined David at the breakfast table.

An hour later warmly dressed with scarves, gloves and wellies, they set off for the local park. David carried his bucket and spade and she held a small wooden cigar box containing Joey’s stiff little body covered by David’s favourite Thomas The Tank handkerchief. It was turning into a real adventure for David skipping happily along in front of Tina. Usually they headed straight for the swings and roundabout but today there was much more exciting things to do.

It was freezing walking around in the biting cold January wind trying to decide on a suitable burial site. Several times David stopped and squealed excitedly,

“here Mummy here”

The first time he stopped, he wanted to dig up a large rose bush right in the middle of a flowerbed and the second time he found a spot under a huge oak tree.Tina knew she could never dig through the winter, rock hard soil among the thick brown roots so she moved him hastily on, saying,

“come on tiger, I know just the right place”. David followed trustingly, he knew his Mum could do anything, she was the bestest Mum in the whole world.

Tina finally stopped at a small shrub garden. It seemed ideal, as there was plenty of room between the plants for her to make a small hole without damaging anything. The frost had hardened the soil and it was just like digging concrete. David’s little spade made absolutely no impression. Luckily Tina had thought to bring a small trowel as well. Getting down on her knees beside her small son, she was soon digging with energy.

“Ordinance 32, paragraph 3, states that mutilating shrubs or plants belonging to the council is subject to a maximum fine of £1000”.

Scrambling to her feet, Tina found herself looking into the cross, red face of a park keeper. Frightened by the cross, loud voice, David quickly got behind Tina.

“Oh. I am most certainly not mutilating any plant or shrub I am only trying to bury my son’s budgie Joey. You see we don’t have a garden and Joey died during the night and........”

Cutting her off sharply, the park keeper pompously quoted another law about using the park grounds to dump rubbish.
Tina drew herself up to her full height and very pink in the face began telling the officious man just what she thought of him, the council, the parks committee and burocracy in general.

A small crowd soon began to gather and add their own comments, some in Tina’s favour and others for the council.
Things began to get quite heated and a little out of hand. David began crying softly at first and then much louder. He was getting cold and his lovely morning digging holes, burying Joey and getting to say at least one prayer, was fast spoiling into a grownup’s argument. At the height of the row, Tina felt someone pull her by the hand. Clutching firmly onto the protesting David and the cigar box containing the unfortunate Joey, she found herself being dragged off by a tall, powerful stranger. He totally ignored her spluttering protests until they reached the other side of the park and then he let her go.

“How dare you” Tina managed between puffs and pants. “How dare you manhandle me like that”?

The man looked down at her. It flashed through her mind that he had very kind, twinkly eyes.

“If I had not come along when I did, I reckon by now you would have been arrested for inciting a riot, ordinance 23 paragraph 5”
Despite herself, Tina started to laugh.

“I was causing a bit of a commotion wasn’t I but honestly I got so cross. We were doing no harm, only trying to bury Joey. If we had a garden of our own, we wouldn’t need his rotten park. I didn’t hurt a single one of his precious plants, so there was no need for him to have a go at us and anyway he was horrid”

David was still sniveling, so Tina bent down and wiped his nose and gave him a cuddle.

“Sorry tiger, I guess your day is spoilt”.

The man with the kind eyes bent down with them, ruffling David’s fair hair.

“No young man, your day is most definitely not spoiled. Allow me to introduce myself, Michael Laver at your service, knight in shining armour and funeral director supreme. I have a large back garden, which will make a perfect resting place for poor Joey. What do you say?” Tina was not at all convinced but David was thrilled. He jumped up and down, tears quite forgotten.

“Show me, show me”

Despite her normally very cautious nature towards strangers, male strangers in particular, Tina found herself agreeing to go to the man’s home. “I only live a very short walk away from the park and I come here most days to walk my dog”. Tina glanced around but could see no dog and said so. Michael Laver laughed.

“Horace is a lazy so and so, so when he felt how cold it was this morning, he chose to stay home by the fire. I felt like a walk so I came on my own. I needed the exercise even if Horace didn’t. Do you like dogs David?”

The little boy’s eyes lit up. “Oh yes, I love dogs. Is Horace big and hairy, does he like little boys?”

Michael laughed again. Tina noticed that he laughed a lot and it was nice. “Yes he is big and hairy and if you pat him a lot, he will be your friend for ever”.

“Oh boy” David said happily, “this is really a bestest morning”.

Back at Michael’s house, the internment of poor Joey was carried out with due solemnity and dignity. David got to sing two verses of All Things Bright And Beautiful and insisted upon reciting his favourite nursery rhyme Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.
After the funeral, they all went into the house, which was big and comfortable, if a little masculine. Tina couldn’t help thinking that a few bright cushions and flowers would make such a difference. It was obvious that this was a man’s house, nothing feminine about it and strangely Tina felt glad.

Michael quickly made mugs of frothy hot chocolate to warm them and they shared a whole packet of custard cream biscuits.
David and Horace ran around exploring while Tina and Michael chatted quietly. Suddenly it was lunchtime. It just seemed completely natural to have a picnic of French bread and cheese in the lounge in front of a roaring log fire. David shared his lunch with Horace, who obliged by hoovering up all the crumbs and licking David’s face and hands in appreciation. By now, Tina knew a lot more about Michael. He was divorced, had been for quite a few years and he ran a small computer company.

“I am by no means rich but I have really high hopes for one day”

He owned this house and also had a small cottage in the country, a legacy from a favourite Aunt. “One day I hope to retire to the cottage and write a book but until then it is work as usual”

Tina got the distinct impression that he really enjoyed his work and retirement would not be for a while yet.She told him about Peter and how lonely she had felt since his death.

“It was such a pointless waste of a soldier’s life, he was killed in a car accident not fighting in a war or a conflict which would somehow have made his death more bearable” She felt strange talking about Peter to a stranger but Michael seemed to understand and it was good to unburden some of the feelings she had bottled up for so long Tina felt very comfortable in Michael’s company. He was nice. Not pushy or fussy with David. He didn’t try to talk down to the small boy but was completely natural. David obviously liked him. Tina noticed the little boy staring at the man with something like hero-worship. Lunch drew into tea and Tina found herself cooking baked beans on toast, which they ate in front of the fire.

“I always have to sit up to the table at home in case I make a mess” David informed Michael very solemnly.

“Quite right too” he replied, “but today is a magic day and we can do things we don’t usually do, tomorrow though everything is back to normal”

Tina found herself thinking that she liked magic days like this and did not want to go back to normal. Normal was boring and today was wonderful. To David’s absolute delight, they toasted muffins and marshmallows over the open fire and he was allowed to have a glass of lemonade with the tiniest drop of wine to turn it pinky - red. Michael and Tina sat chatting cosily in the warm room, the flickering fire casting shadows on the walls. David fell asleep on the settee totally worn out by his exciting day.
There was such a feeling of security in this big old house and Tina felt as if she had known this big, kind man for many years.
A feeling of such peace and warmth, such as she had not felt since Peter’s death completely overwhelmed her. Her eyes felt heavier and heavier until they closed and she too slept. Tina woke with a start. It was dark outside. Rubbing her eyes she apologised.

“It must be all that fresh air this morning, I don’t usually drop off like that. It really is time we were going. It has been such a wonderful day, David has enjoyed himself so much”. Michael leaned over and surprised her by kissing her gently on the lips.
It was a soft, tender kiss, which left her feeling confused and disturbed. “I hope you enjoyed yourself too and will want to come back again because I just don’t remember when I have enjoyed baked beans so much, you really are a great cook”.
As they laughed gently together, David stirred and stretched sleepily.

“Come on tiger, time to go home”

Michael bent down to the small boy. “How about a piggy back home?”

“Oh no.” Tina protested. “You really don’t need to bother, we don’t live far away”.

It was already too late; by now David was perched on Michael’s broad shoulders and he looked so happy, Tina didn’t have the heart to make him get down again. Michael pulled Tina’s arm through his and warmly linked, the happy trio walked the short distance through the dark empty park to the large block of flats, which was home to Tina and David. Seeing them safely to the lifts, Michael put David down.” Goodbye tiger” he said patting the top of David’s fair curly head.

David looked up questioningly. “Are you a soldier Michael?”

“No tiger nothing as exciting as that”.

“Good” David replied firmly. “Soldiers go away and they never come home again and I want to see you and Horace again real soon”. Michael glanced at Tina who felt a lump in her throat. In the gloom of the grey concrete walls, they looked into each other’s eyes searching for a sign that the other might perhaps be feeling the same need. It was up to them both now whether they allowed it to go further, to grow and become stronger. A flame had been lit and now all they needed to do was fan the flames.
Michael raised her hand to his mouth and the warmth of his breath gave the promise of joy to come. Despite the cold biting wind, Tina felt inner warmth that had been missing for a long time.

“Goodnight Michael. Thank you for a wonderful day, I hope I see you again soon”

“You can be sure of that Tina, I think we will be seeing a great deal of each other from now on”.

As the lift doors closed he blew them both a kiss.

Jane Manning

 

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