All at (north) sea...!

Judith Scott

Inspired by the Editor’s travel saga ‘All at Sea’ (see ‘Travel’) I wondered if you would be interested in my recent sailing adventure?

It wasn’t quite as far or quite as glamorous, but it did have its moments, and it is, financially speaking, more within everyone’s reach, which has to be a plus.

I signed up for a mini-cruise, involving an overnight sailing, a day out in Belgium, and an overnight sailing back to Hull. I know, I know, it’s not exactly Robinson Crusoe, but what the hell. The weather was abominable in England, and I was so ready for a change, I figured that I wouldn’t care what it was doing when I was being cosseted aboard my cruise-ship. OK - cruise-ferry.

Wrong. I may have cared quite a lot if we had encountered a severe gale, storm, tornado or hurricane…but we didn’t, so there. In any event, these ships are so BIG that even though we had Force 8 winds, it hardly rocked the boat at all.

So – the hour approached, anchors were weighed, or whatever it is they do with ‘em, and imperceptibly we began to move from our dock. I sat in the Forward Lounge with a glass of something congenial in my hand and watched the skyline swivel gradually past the nearest window. A couple of drinks later, I actually got up and pressed my eager nose against the glass, to view the glory of the high seas at sunset. I was a little taken aback to see that we appeared to be in a car park.

I am not joking. At first glance, all I could see was a huge concrete area covered in cars for the greater part, but with a further section full of endless white vans! Stunned, I peered vertically down the side of the ship as best I could, and at least we were still in water. Not parked up for the night, then - there was still hope! The vehicles all seemed to have some sort of wrapping paper on. I guessed they were brand new and scheduled for export, or, perhaps, newly imported. Couldn’t see one with an additional ribbon/gift card/my name on, so lost interest and returned to my seat. I am pleased to report that eventually we did move down our appointed channel and actually leave the dock en route for le Continent…….

Options for the outward-bound evening were many and varied. There was a cinema with 3 mainstream films on offer, (including an early one for children), quiet reading rooms, gourmet restaurant, theme bar with music and dancing; also a more restrained piano bar. Of course, one could have had a stroll on the deck, but I have to tell you it looked fairly uninviting, being under 2” of water and with a very (and I mean VERY) invigorating wind blowing from the west…….not to mention the pitch darkness. Guess the romance of such is a bit overrated, at least on the North Sea! Pass!

Next morning, having arrived and docked while we still slept, we were supplied with a map by the ferry company and thence drove without incident to a large supermarket to do a bit of Christmas shopping. A most interesting visit. I was unsurprised to see that the amazing array of fresh fruit, vegetables and herbs was not only far superior to anything we have in Britain, but also it was also very much cheaper. Also, the sheer quantities of fresh fish would have to be seen to be believed. It certainly was fresh, in fact some of it was still moving. I found that quite horrible and no way would I have bought any; I can quite see why so many people are turning vegetarian.

Still, I was happy to buy – along with the obligatory wine and spirits - quite a lot of household items at half the price I pay

here. Odd, when many items are actually made in Britain… any explanation from the manufacturers? No, I thought not………

Also in passing, I must mention the quality of the roads, and the easy flow of traffic. No hold-ups, no hassle, plenty of room, and above all, PETROL very much cheaper than here (where is it not?)

So, a trouble free expedition; and having returned to the ship after our day out, we showered, changed, and headed for the restaurant…..

This really does have something for everyone. There is a choice of starter, served at your table, then after that it is ‘help yourself’ from a buffet of astonishing range. It consists of a varied carvery section with vegetables of many varieties; then there are vegetarian choices, fish dishes, plus a huge cold buffet/salad selection, and also a very popular range of exotic Indonesian dishes.

These are all supplemented with a range of sweets such as sorbets, crepes, cheesecakes, and of course, cheese by the wagonload, with biscuits. So, even if you are trying to follow some kind of diet (and who isn’t!), still lots of choice that won’t bust your calorie bank.

I had to smile, looking around. Any buffet where you can go up and fill your plate as often as you like soon shows up the porkies.. Four chaps of no mean girth at a table near us went up and got a hefty dinner .. three times each!!!

It was also easy to spot the freight drivers. They were the ones with stubble and tee shirts who had a couple of bottles of Dom Perignon on their table…. Don’t grudge it you, lads, it’s not an easy life being a haulier in rip-off Britain.

On to the theme bar, then, and that night it was 60’s and 70’s. So good to see the entire older end rocking the night away and reliving their youth. Well, after all, it’s not THAT far behind us, is it?

Following a good night’s sleep, we breakfasted on board, and then disembarked at 8.30am for the short drive home. Of course it was raining, but it didn’t dampen my enthusiasm. I shall be off again soonest. Quick chorus of ‘A life on the Ocean Wave’, (with apologies to all who only have to look our of their windows at the floods – we feel for you).

If you can’t make Australia, then sail home via Singapore like Bob, give it a whirl. Be sea-ing you…………….

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